Pretty girls get their A-level results

National newspaper editors were jumping for joy today as they managed to break all previous records for A-level results coverage.

Said one unnamed editor of a national newspaper: “Every year we set ourselves extremely high standards for our A-level results coverage. Once again this year we have exceeded all predictions for the number of pretty young ladies receiving their results we can splash all over our publications <snigger>… so to speak.”

He continued: “We will be having words with The Independent which managed to include three young men in one of its photos, although they were blurred and in the background and their heads were cropped out. Nevertheless, we mustn’t let the very high standards we’ve set ourselves slip going forward.”